What is “Friendsgiving?” Friendsgiving is a feast among friends, much like the traditional Thanksgiving holiday, but it is centered around additional connections and community beyond the family circle.
Friends from across the United States come together during the month of November to share a more relaxed, potluck-style meal, where everyone brings a dish and enjoys each other’s company, especially when Thanksgiving can be lonely for some people who are far from family or have strained relationships with their family.
Friendsgiving has gained popularity over the years, originating on social media sites like Twitter and MySpace and later appearing in lifestyle magazines. This concept gained traction quickly due to a growing need for younger generations to build community, leading many to celebrate the idea of a “chosen family.”
The concept of “chosen family” is central to the Friendsgiving phenomenon. Faculty advisor and board member of the Lavender Lions, Dr. Settembrino, defined it clearly: “Chosen family is a term that trans and queer people use to describe the close friendships we build with one another that are often stronger than familial relationships.”
This focus on chosen family is visible right here on campus; clubs such as the Lavender Lions are tight-knit communities that understand the importance of having a chosen family firsthand. The club is attending the Third Annual Queer Northshore Friendsgiving, and the invitation is extended to the public. This event is free to everyone and will take place at Tandem Coffee and Cocktails in Mandeville on November 27. RSVP at queernorthshore.org.
In the previous year, Queer Northshore created a “family tree,” which Settembrino described as “an interactive art installation that allowed participants to write their names and positive messages on paper leaves that can be attached to the large tree. It symbolized our coming together as a community and family in a really powerful way.”
A chosen family is special because it can offer a new sense of belonging and help uplift people in ways traditional families may not. Friendsgiving with chosen family, like that within the Lavender Lions, upholds the values of a traditional Thanksgiving while bringing together newfound friends and circles of peace.
The power of a chosen family to create a sense of belonging isn’t limited to one group. Throughout Southeastern’s Greek life, you can also see the trend of people coming together with shared values and compassion to support one another, often becoming as close as family. Friendsgiving traditions have become popular sisterhood and brotherhood events, making sure each member is cared for and supported this holiday season.
Students across campus, particularly those in college away from home, echo this sentiment. Junior strategic communications major and member of Tri Sigma sorority, Emerson Milligan said, “Friendsgiving is one of the most important times to show up for your people who love you and cherish you no matter what. I always cherish the moments I have with my friends who have become my sisters.”
Freshman early childhood education major and member of Alpha Sigma Tau sorority, Emma Rodriguez, also noted, “Friendsgiving is a moment to slow down, share good food, laugh about everything, and appreciate the people who make life feel lighter.”
As college students move away from home, some further than others, holidays become more challenging to manage. Friendsgiving is such an impactful holiday among younger generations in America because it emphasizes the importance of showing up for each other and providing continuous support throughout life.
Senior communication sciences and disorders major and member of Zeta Phi Beta Sorority, Inc., Mia Spears stated, “This year we are doing a Friendsmas instead of Friendsgiving. But it brings me closer to my sorors and allows us to fellowship in a relaxed setting. It really feels like a found family/home away from home.”
Minden native and freshman English education major Jaliyah Oliver is a member of Zeta Phi Beta Sorority, Inc., and has a personal connection to the special holiday. She stated, “Since I’m from up North Louisiana and my family is four hours away, I’ve felt very supported by my sorors and close friends. In a way, they are all like my family. Down here having my own little family, I would say Friendsgiving is super important, especially if you are like me and four hours away from home.”
For some people, Friendsgiving is more than a meal; it celebrates the bonds of friendship that cannot be broken. The modern holiday is rooted in traditional gratitude, community, support and love in ways that family might not be.
